disciples.

Following after Jesus, aka being a disciple, can be made out to be pretty effortless, comfortable, even fun sometimes. What we either a) don't realize or b) choose to bypass, is that this is not an accurate picture of what Scriptures tell us. When Jesus invited people to become followers it wasn't your typical alter call. He wasn't sugar coating it, or trying to sell Himself. In Luke 14:25-35, He said...

"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple...

In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple."

Do we know Christ this way? Do we follow Him the way He calls us to follow Him? It seems to me like we always water this down, soften it, in order to justify how we are living. We must hate our father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, friends, classmates, roommates, and our own life to be His disciple? Are you sure? YES, He requires a SUPERIOR LOVE over everything. A love that in comparison makes our love for everyone else look like hate. A love so superior that causes love for others to spring up. So, the question is, do I truly love Him? Is He the reason I live? Do I want Him more than anything else? This reminds me of when I first got to NZ. Love and passion for Him was missing and I knew that if I could truly love Him, then everything else should stem from that love. As I prayed for love, He gave it to me. But, today, I am reminded to continue praying for this superior love. I am challenged by the fact that I may not love Him as much as I should. I love other things in life too. But, I want to love Him superiorly. I desire a superior love for Him. He is worthy of it, no doubt. He does not deserve left overs. And, if He does not recieve all my love, then I am not a disciple. It's as simple as that.

He also requires an EXCLUSIVE LOYALTY from me (14:27). The reality is, if I am carrying my cross, I am dead, i.e. I have no plans, no dreams, everything is over. Being dead to myself is what it means to be a disciple. THROUGH THE CROSS OF CHRIST, WE DIE TO THE LIFE WE LIVE. Galatians 2:20 says that 'I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.' I am dead to everything yet alive to Him. Now, the life of Christ determines everything about me. We forget to COUNT THE COSTS of what it means to be a disciple. Just like a warrior going into war, it is important for us to consider whats at stake before going into battle. I am a warrior, in a battle, and there are many costs. Following Him is costly.

Jesus also requires TOTAL LOSS (or SACRIFICE). Most of us have a negative connotation to the word sacrifice. Hebrews 11:26...

"He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because he was looking ahead to his reward."

I LOVE this verse. Moses new that the disgrace, hardships, and suffering were nothing compared to Christ, our great reward. When we realize what the reward is, it doesn't seem like sacrifice at all! I am told that in order to be His disciple, I should give up everything. Not just a few things, EVERYTHING.

And this is where I get fired up...

What I've been wanting to write about all semester but I know I don't have it down, so who am I to talk? But here goes...

As Christians, we should be taking His word seriously. Not the watered down, disregard the hard parts, soften it up a bit, easy way. NO. I have been challenged and frustrated by this all semester. How can "Christians" go on preaching this watered down version of the gospel??? How can Christians go on living watered down lives??? I don't get it. How could we miss it? It's right there! Do we not believe that the words that come out of JESUS' mouth are TRUTH? He straight up tells us. A life following Him is COSTLY. It's HARD. The world is continually being decieved on what it truly means to be a Christ follower because "Christians" continually live giving Him divided love, half-hearted obedience, and partial control. If you are searching, do not look to the typical 'sunday-goer' because I have found that very FEW actually grasp this radical life we are called to live. Look at the Word of God. Go to Him. He is the ONLY one with answers. The only good and perfect being. I am so sick of His word and this life we are called to live being watered down, disregarded, and ignored. SO sick of it. Because, HE. IS. WORTH. IT. He is worth the cost. The reward is worth it. A reward greater than ANYTHING else. I want people to know this so badly. To believe it and experience it. He is the only one worthy. He alone is worthy of a superior love, exclusive loyalty, and total sacrifice. Only He can satisfy. This. Is. The. Gospel. No, it doesn't make sense. No, I'm sure as heck not perfect. But, yes, He is wrenching my heart and opening my eyes to see His supremacy. Yes, I am wrestling with Him trying to figure out what this means for my life. And my deepest desire right now is to embrace Him, abandon it all, give Him my life, fall on my face, let go of myself, fix my eyes on him and RUN TO HIM.