remembering

I know, I know, I just blogged but 1. I can't sleep and 2. There is so much on my mind.

I probably blog about the past experiences too much but I can't help it. Today, although I was forced to be consumed with school work, the world was in the back of my brain (what's new??). In particular, New Zealand. As another DTS is about the start in the quaint little town of Oxford and the staff (many of which are great friends) are preparing for this new batch of students, I long to be right back there. And of course since I can't be there my thoughts are on the many memories I have there. Almost an exact year has passed since I left. Emrie (one of my closest friends who I had the pleasure of also going on my outreach with) blogged today and she literally put words in my mouth. Today my thoughts are her thoughts so I figured I'd just copy them...

Sometimes the past year of my life seems very surreal. So much happened. I saw so many new things, met so many new people, walked on new turf, found myself in a whole new spirituality, began to live a whole new way. It all took place in the matter of months so I am still, to this day, processing what all went down to get me where I am now.
Depending on the day, I am either flooded with memories of where I have been and what I have done or don’t even consider that it at all happened...

I think it is great to remember. I need to remember who I am, where I have been, who I have met, what I have seen, what God has done for me, DAILY. I have to remember all of this because in forgetting, I lose sight of who God is.
So today I am reminding myself YES I did study the Bible in New Zealand for 3 months, yes I spent one week tramping the South Island on foot with one sandwich, twenty dollars and two others in the name of Jesus and His provision, yes I played with orphaned children in Bali, yes I gave my testimony to a bunch of Taiwanese Senior Citizens, yes I went from door to door in rural Cambodia proclaiming the way of Jesus to Buddhist families, yes I looked prostitutes in the eyes and told them that they are loved by a God so much bigger than all of the mess they are stuck in, yes I got to walk where Jesus walked and see, firsthand, the history of the Bible in Israel. All of that was just the beginning, now I see that. God grabbed my heart and opened my eyes to a new way and I can’t deny it any longer. I have to live every day remembering what he has done for me so that I can continue to walk in that light.

Tonight all of these memories are flooding my head. My heart literally hurts. Will I ever go back to Oxford? Will I get to see my brothers and sisters that I shared so much life with again? It's hard. But like Emrie said, it is SO good to remember. To look back on His faithfulness and all that He taught me. Those 6 months shaped the way I will live for the rest of my life. I don't ever want to forget. Can we just hit the "rewind" button?