Obedience has been a big theme for me over the past few weeks. As I posted previously, I want to be radically obedient. God has revealed to me that as long as I am open and listening to His voice and OBEY Him, I will be exactly where He wants me. Well, tonight was my first test of obedience and it was HARD. During worship tonight I knew I needed to share with the school what has been going on in my heart. As we worshiped and a few people spoke, my heart began pounding out of my chest. I KNEW I needed to share but I wasn't exactly sure what AND I hate getting up in front of everyone. It was in that moment of debating whether or not I should go to the front that the Lord said,
Katy, You said you will obey. If you cannot be obedient in something as little as getting up in front of your own brothers and sisters, how in the world will you be obedient in the big stuff?
I fought it. I didn't want to share. But I did it. And it was freeing. Once He spoke I knew I couldn't ignore Him. If I ignored this small request to be vulnerable then what makes me think I would be obedient to large requests such as where He wants me to go and what He wants me to do. Maybe it doesn't sound like a big deal, but for me this was a big step. I feel like this was my first "test" of obedience. I had no idea it would be so hard. I feel like these tests will continually get tougher. What have I gotten myself into? I'm know there will be times when I fail. But, I think God is going to teach me what obedience looks like one little step at a time. A life that is completely His is what I want. Tonight was the beginning of a HARD journey and I am thankful for it.